A Bolanle Austen-Peters Film in Collaboration with Swirl Films, Ornaments Productions Limited, Misa Productions and B2B Integrated Media present Elvina Ibru (Mopelola Halloway), Toyin Abraham (Dunni Fernandez), Broda Shaggi (Shaggi), Sharon Ooja (Tokunboh), Jide Kosoko (Baba Eko), Alexx Ekubo (Nnamdi), Bisola Aiyeola (Kiki Princewill), Tanan Adelana (Kaima), Osas Ighodaro (Demidun Holloway), Monalisa Chinde (Ngozi Gomez), Jimmy Odukoya (George) Gbenga Titiloye (Akin Hollway), Denola Grey (Venya). Director, Bolanle Austen-Peters; Director of Photography, Adekunle ‘Nodash’ Adejuyigbe; Screenwriter, Anthony Kehinde Joseph; ©2019.
African movies have come a long way from when they fielded Ekem Awo and Patient Ozorkwo, Sam Loko, and John Okafor in slapstick and burlesque comedies that we, after work, always came to watch in our living rooms. Ekem and Patient fight over chop money or fighting with his late brother’s wife. Sam Loko, pot-bellied, palm wine in a plastic cup in one hand, speaking the Queen’s language like an old-school English teacher, wiggling his hands in somebody’s face. Pete Edochie and his traditional foibles, that Aesop of ours on the continent. What of Okafor’s Nicodemus (2014)? It behooves me to side with Nnamdi (Alexx Ekubo) when Tokunboh (Sharon Ooja) slights them for her project. Nnamdi could smugly retort when she dismisses Nollywood as a travesty. “These are the juggernauts of the East, movers and shakers of Ashaba! Powerful epics.” I concur.
Nigerian movies, as we originally called them, burlesque as they were, with almost three or four actors, locations as well native and pastoral, prop cars that looked old and shabby, and picturesque scenes that presented how we lived in our villages. Natural. No bling. But we loved and cherished those movies, for they depicted our daily lives. The Nollywood films we see today present us with a fantastical world filled with skyscrapers, Bentleys, tiled terraces, and uniformed staff covering mansions; the common language spoken in living and dining rooms is about London, Paris, Milan, South Africa, China, or Turkey. It is all about sophistication. Instead of a story of a village palm wine tapper, we are urged to dream of a world that stays only in our fantasies.
However, the two most crowded extras and expensive sets in the annals of Nollywood productions must be Chief Daddy (2018) and The Bling Lagosians, who have not yet reached the extras at Ghandi’s funeral. I cannot put a tab on the production cost of these two movies. But I’m sure they are astronomical, in naira terms. Chief Daddy, I heard it brought in 1.5 billion Naira on its premiere. Like most Nollywood productions, The Bling Lagosians is conservative about telling us their production cost and take-ins on the premier. One characteristic difference between the two films is that one celebrates a notable Chief Daddy’s going home (funeral), and the other is about the Holloways losing their business empire to an assault levied against him by shareholders. I will then focus my review on the Holloways.
The Bling Lagosians as a movie reminds me of The Magnificent Ambersons (1942). Google it if you haven’t heard of the film or aren’t a film buff like me. The Magnificent Ambersons is about a once-acclaimed wealthy family by the turn of the Century, in the throes of losing it all because the family refuses to accept the transient nature of things that humanity is subject to. They held on to the old order while time flew through their fingers. Just as The Magnificent Amberson’s wealth is compromised by the changes in times, so is the passing of Baba Eko (Jide Kosoko), the Hail Mary in Akin’s life. Baba Eko’s casket hardly touched the ground when problems came knocking at Akin’s door. We are talking about the circumstances he would face from the members of the St. Ives board. “You are right, Alhaji. But some are inappropriate where we come to honor the dead,” Akin responds. It is like the Trojans at the gate of Troy.
Our host, Akin, narrates the Bling Lagosians: Akin Holloway (Gbenga Titiloye), the wealthy patriarch of the Holloway dynasty. God, Akin, he is so overly done. He lavishes his generational legacy of wealth and establishment. This present head of the Holloways dynasty mixes business with pleasure; in fact, there is more pleasure and no business. You can parallel his character to George in The Magnificent Ambersons. As a shareholder could complain, “We are eating the seeds instead of planting.”
In addition to extravagant spending on trips to Dubai, Milan, Fiji Island, and Mauritius, all on chartered flights multiple times a year, he has homes in Asokoro, Spain, and London and fleets of Maybach, Rolls Royce, and Bentleys, Akin summed it all up by messing with the only man, who has been in his corner since Baba—Grey’s wife. “What is the tenth commandment, Akin? Thou shalt not covet your neighbor’s wife. I’ve been with you, stood with you, stuck with you, and walked with you. That one thing that was mine, you must have it. My wife! In your bed!”
“All the generations of the Holloways have ensured that they do good by that name,” Akin tells his family at a dinner table. When he warned his family at the dinner table to stay down from lavish, he went on a spending spree, buying a Mercedes SE class, a gold-plated Cartier watch with an alligator strap. “I am Holloway. I want something with a limited edition,” he brags. Even his said side chic, his buddy and business partner Grey’s wife, doesn’t spare Akin to warn Akin about his extravagancy at such a time when he is not sitting well on the issue with St. Ives:
Kaima (Tanan Adelana), “Are you buying a watch? Aren’t you supposed to be piping down to avoid AMCON snipers…But isn’t that what got you there in the first place?”
Akin, “Will you call me when this sanctimonious spell passes?”
Mopelola Holloway, the matriarch, is a refined woman, spoilt by money and society, acclaimed as the cream de la cream of the Lagos crop. She speaks like a blue-blood Briton with no trace of a Nigerian Yoruba accent. Akin spoils her with money and whatever requests she makes from the father of her two daughters, Tokunboh and Damidun Holloway (Osas Ighodaro); herself having a marital problem with George (Jimmi Odukoya) but manages to put a warm face on it to impress the world that her marriage is bling, bling, even as the wild wind threatening the Holloway economic oligarchy. Mopelola is only concerned about her birthday. She must maintain the Holloway status quo. And therefore, she wants her 51st birthday bash.
There are specific characteristics in this movie worth mentioning. Ngozi (Monalisa Chinde), Kiki Princewill (Bisola Aiyeola), and Dunni Fernandez (Toyin Abraham) are like the Greek chorus in the context of ancient Greek Tragedy–this time, the Holloways. Much information about the tragedy, shame, and embarrassment the Holloways will go through and are going through comes to us through gossip and backbiting. This group’s bling, bling status got them to refer to Nigerians in Atlanta as “cockroaches.” Nigerians in Atlanta live an everyday life, having bills to pay and getting to work the next day. It is not like spending time in massage parlors, saunas, and dress bling to show off. It is all a façade in Lagos! Anyway, the role of these characters in the story is to replace the ‘human tabloid,’ which they perform well.
Then, there is an exciting relationship between Nnamdi and Tokunboh when putting together a saleable script. Art meets money. Tokunboh wants an Oscar-winning script, but Nnamdi wants other ingredients added to her soup. “People need to laugh. The country is hard.” He only wants to pack money. I have been in such a scene with Watchin’ Lydia’s production. Funny scene. I wanted Hollywood recognition, but my money-hungry partner wanted lots of money–an irreconcilable conflict of interest. We eventually fell out.
The Bling Lagosians is a movie based on the falsity of the life of the Holloway family. The word ‘Bling’ etymology started in American ghettos in the 90s. It is the flashy, glittery garb one wears to show off. It could be gold-plated chains dangling on a neck, gold-plated bracelets, rings, fake Michael Kors, Jeovanni, Coco Chanel, Ralph Lauren, Christian Dior, Giorgio Amani, etc. Rap singers caught up on the word ‘bling,’ and then it filtered into our street parlance. These days, men your age wear the latest shiny men’s jackets. It is all self-extortion of oneself to give one self-gratification. Listen to Mrs. Holloway and Akin in the garden. And take note of the falsity of the bling life:
Akin, “But seriously, your 50th cost one million dollars. This is your 51st birthday; it will be higher.”
Modupe, “Well, naturally.”
Akin, “That means we’re telling the people to go and do what they hell like.”
Modupe, “Akin, my husband, you are Lagosian. I don’t know if it is in the air or something in the water, but something about this city makes you live on the edge. And no matter the trials or tribulations that come with it, we cannot fall, Akin. We can’t. It’s not possible now.”
The falsity of the bling life is exhibited in the interaction between Mrs. Holloway and Venya (Denola Grey) when she cannot make a check for the party preparation, and the young man comments, “I hate broke people.” Madam couldn’t even pay the salaries of her staff but went on to buy Swiss design textiles to put up a front for her 51st birthday.
When the wall closed in on the Holloway dynasty, Akin lost it all. Even Dunni provocatively said, “From Holloway to No Way. I told you: pride, ladies, comes before a fall.” Mrs. Holloway and her daughters watch their kingdom fall right before them on the TV screen. Akin is driven from his one-time illustrious office. As he walks out, we hear the song: What a life, what a wonderful life/The choices we make/ What a life/Of fame and shame and power and glory/What a life, What a bitch of a life/Viva! Over I am. Akin turns over his shoulder and sees St. Ives towering over him. He has lost what his father labored to build. Tear-jerking!
A wise man once said, “Hard times create strong men, and strong men create easy times, and easy times create weak men, creating difficult times. It would be best if you created warriors and not parasites. The historical reality is that all great empires rot from within.” Akin destroys the Pa Dahinde Holloway dynasty from within. This movie is a cautionary tale about newly accrued inherited businesses in modern Nigeria. Business will never be as usual, assigning legitimacy to our children when they do not deserve the management of multi-billion investments. Akin never deserves the portfolio accorded him. It shouldn’t be Game of Thrones–about Tokunboh’s line at the dinner table with her parents– but business heads would be answerable to investors and have a say in choosing who’ll care for their kobo.
Figuratively, what Bling Lagosians is expressing here is that Nollywood will dictate life in Africa from now on. Appear at parties like Alexx Ekubo in a suit with patterns that make one look like a matador. Talk fake, dress fake, and lie your way out of any given situation if, in the end, you have your 51st birthday with Lagosians of any color or creed. Everybody wants to stay bling. Better yet, just be plain ostentatious.
The Bling Lagosians as a title does matter, but what is more is the movie’s name, “Halloway.” Today’s modern Lagos was the make and mark of the business brass, the Holloways. Great-great grandpa Enuyami (John Benjamin Holloway) was the patriarch. We may not know the current history of the Holloways that the movie mimics and what happens after. Of course, The Bling Lagosians‘ Holloway is run off the property of Ivey Towers.